by William Moultrie
Washington, DC – Hundreds of politicians have made a career of going to Washington to fight pork, but few have gone so far as to fling birds at pigs in the White House.
As President Obama addressed the gathering of state governors, most were paying rapt attention to what he was saying. South Carolina’s Governor Nikki Haley, however, was working on a particularly challenging level of Angry Birds on her iPad.
“Her technique and strategy are very good,” said Mississippi Governor Haley Barbour, a fellow Angry Birds afficianado. “She does have a tendency to a more linear approach, eschewing creative angles, but she has clearly put in some serious time and knows what she’s doing.”
Haley’s obsession with her iPad didn’t go unnoticed by the White House staff.
“At first we were pretty annoyed,” said Jay Carney, White House press secretary. “But she was really on a roll and you don’t want to mess with someone when they’re on a streak. I mean really, she was clearing screens on her first shot and getting three stars to boot. The governors may have been listening to the president, but by the end of the speech the staff were all watching Nikki and rooting for her.”
Haley was unapologetic about her preoccupation with the game.
“I gave him all the attention I felt he deserved,” said Haley, “and meanwhile the taxpayers of South Carolina bought this iPad and I owe it to them to make the most of it. Now, anybody catch what he was saying?”