by William Moultrie
Obama, a notorious fan of basketball, didn’t even have the courtesy to make his picks before the play-in game where Winthrop was unceremoniously thrashed by Arkansas-Something-or-other.
“He could have at least picked against us,” said Winthrop senior forward Robert Krause. “We got our automatic bid over a week ago, so the only suspense left for us was whether the president would pick us to win or lose, but he didn’t even bother… I guess we know where we stand now.”
Unfortunately, the state’s other schools didn’t fare much better in thee president’s estimation.
Obama picked Wofford to lose the higher-seeded Wisconsin and Clemson to be upset by lower-seeded Missouri.
“What the hell?” asked Clemson junior Andy Frack “First he wants to socialize medicine and now he wants us to lose? If I was a voting man, which I’m not, I’d seriously consider voting against him.”
Wofford students, players, and staff were unavailable for comment as they convened a special meeting to decide whether the president’s counter-endorsement was a good or bad thing.